cc

i can be talking about chew's initial... or cyber cafe, but no, its the latter

i am onlining now at the uptown cc... just because i need to send some docos to my boss..

cant wait to get my salary this friday *drools! :P

decided that since i got that money, and since that my shoe is fckingly broken (just today i turn it into a baby croc), so.... SINGAPORE is a must now (After ccw mentioned about the rm70-+ i ll save on shoes.. .and i do believe that there are better choices/options over there) weeeeee...

list of ppl to visit
kaima
eve
kat
aaron ?

hmmm i think thats it ler.. dont have THAT many aussie friends also
i dont mind meeting up with yi xin.. but not to say i knw her la.. lol

dinner with beckie on wed is now yumcha with jap-beckie on thurs --- apparently she is taking jap lessons at uptown.... hahaha.. damn funny ler when she called me today. i do not recognise the ph number, so when i answered the call i was like this 'Good afternoon, this is Mr Kee'. I think that stunned her.. .lol

mmm
went out to ktz yday with kf and ccw.

went out tis morning to help. ate the vege rice. good old times :)

had a dream the other day. i was calling this person... when i do not really want to.. then it rang and i cancelled the call.. then i was like SHIT.. i just gave this person a missed call.. x_X then i woke up and realised that everything is still cooooooooooooooooooooooooooool!

^_^

i thought that taking chances was by kelly clarkson (A) lalalala

oh oh

this morning, i was going to help mer, so i send out a msg to the vts asking them if they are in their office or nt le. i msged them about 10ish

Ian Poh
No...am in bamboo river...
10 :11

Huan Sin
no o.. at client's place ler
12:27

Hon Seng
-


okies, gtg soon... going to withdraw some $$$ and then go back home.. and rot. rot. rot.

'new' weekend

friday - went out Subang Jaya.. was to play cyber, but too packed, ended up having yumcha at Asia Cafe. I didn't order anything. I rmb going back to kammo's house and just slept on the couch. Its like... my waist downwards are vertically hanging, whilst my waist upwards lie on the sofa... .. i slept like that for 6 hrs.

sat - ah peen kor kor's julia's one month dinner buffet. the food was great, but i only had one plate. hmm good time catching up with the cousins, but also post dinner got nth much to do one.... ended up sleeping at ccw's place while i play wii with ccw, chew and hl till 5ish am. crazy! but fun! :)

sun - hl left d :(
stayed at home till 3ish, watched Die Hard 4.0, cleaned up my photo album (took out all photos, going to wait for the new photos to be developed, then only re arrange it)


this weekend, i labeled it new for the new beginning i m looking to start. i needed a confirmation, one of my guy friend gave it to me.

as for the rest,

it feels so weird, when u added someone onto your msn and not talked to them. it is EVEN WEIRDER when people added your to theirs and not talk to you.. X_X

plans for next week - work till 31st i hope - outing with Rebecca - Friday night out in KL -
thats all basically, but obviously, its not enough for me... Ha ha... but i ll try to stay at home more this week (A)

--
on other note
i really want to explain myself to people (& often, i do). sometimes people comment something about me which i don't think is who i really am, and i want to tell them so... but Some of those times, i just give in.

It matters, when it matters to me and you. It doesn't when it only matters to me. Why bother explaining something that people don't even bother about? Besides, more often that not, once people made up their mind, they refuse to change it. Even if they are willing to, it takes heavy persuassion to make them Reluctantly accept your explanation. PLUS, at the end of the day, every one have their own views, so no matter how explainable you can be, in the end, its still an individual perception thing.

so- for whatever you mentioned to me about me, and what you think about me now - .. i ll leave it as it is


'no matter what anyone says, listen to yourself'

i hate that quote so much cos i want to trust you

joke in my mind for the week

what do you get when you flip kit mun around?
Monkey

what do you get when you put joo yee and kit mun together?
Munkee

just something in my mind.

went out with cindy yday... it was nice catching up

i wonder, would it be better for myself if i leave things in the dark sometimes, rather than revealing everything....

hehe.. i talked to hexiang and daniel today. it wasnt a planned yumcha, but the yumcha is quite fulfilling.

watched cloverfield too. Love it! :) impressed by how they combine the CGI + handheld cam + chaos

'love is difficult, love is complicated, most of all, love is rare and hard to find. but once you found it, it is the most beautiful thing you ever see'

it's my life

not sure if u guys knw what i m talking about.
its the first southeast asia reality tv show from MTV.
its basically recording the daily lives of the participants from SG, Indo, Phillipines, Thai, HK and sumowhere else i think, not sure if we have MY in the first episode

anyways
I ll alwys rmb about the Thai girl. she is sooooooooo gorgeous. and one of the episode, the bf dumped her cos of the MTV recording her life everyday. She cried. she was really really sad.

I wish her well.

random shots since i bought my Sw

New Year's eve @ OU - where the fireworks starts before the Curve. KF, Chew, CCW, HL & me. We also saw Jia Yin and her friends over there. :)

I visited Nancy the other day at Uptown. We had the nasi lemak for lunch. Her friend Andrew took the pic for us. Here we also have a photo of the twin egg yolk. It was Nancy's but she didn't eat it. What a waste....

When I saw this KFC, I knew that I had to take the pic. This is where the ppl who went to Langkawi in 2004 had their dinner when we came back by bus frm Langkawi. Everyone parted ways, I followed Min Li's car.
Kammo and her kopi ...


Other humanly photos - Kit Mun, CCW, Wern Hui, Jo Jo & Nicole, CCW & Jia Yin

Sri Petaling .............................Mohsin................................ CCW's house

Korean BBQ ............................. Pasar malam @ Chow Yang


TGIF & Gabriel with Li Lin~~

Our shared meal - 3 course meal

Someone hiding away from the camera.. @ Borders, Li Lin & I, and ... wondering, is it a new pair of shoes, or pair of new shoes?

We watched Gabriel - it was OK. I think it could have been great. Sin City-ish combined with powers to fight at super speed. The editing sucks. If only they can move frm one scene to another better.. it would be above average in my opinion. The movie also tends to drag on unnecessary scenes while not explaining on important details.

Dinner with CCW & Daniel @ SS2/Sec.17 - banana leaf meal... I forced myself to finish the meal. Regret. Felt so sick afterwards that I walked out of the restaurant to take a walk. By the time I was outside I was feeling flingy and my vision starts to get white... Luckily, I got OK afterwards and we went to cyber. Played Company of Heroes. HL would like it

The best photo of all... the house where I used to live in. Damansara Utama SS24/42A. =)

outing with the girls

so many things to blog!

just gonna blog about the outing with the girls/ friends from HELP.

i think i was really shocked and worried when nan told me to bring down two bottles of water for kitmun's car... how the lever for the engine cover is on the passenger seat rather than underneath the steering wheel, how dodgy the left back door is... and how 'mist/fog' came in through the air con when we turn it on after switching it off not long ago.

went to nancy's house. met aunty and uncle again. aunty thought kitmun is lydia. hee. nancy took away the ballet photo ady. :( played wii. i lost the bet. thought kitmun has matured. lol. how wrong i was...

hmmm.... i dunno... steven's corner first time... roti telur cheese... how ''''''''''''''safe''''''''''' lydia drove... lol... its all great fun!

it was a pain to organize, but damn worth it!!!

only negative was how nancy kept trying to seduce me.. T_T
every guy would faint to dat... except.....................

lol


'won't you feel me now?'

i'll try not to forget

'you can never right the wrong... no matter how much u want to'

i feel helpless, really. there are those times where you know you are trapped in the corner and the police is right in front of you and you have no choice but to give in. i think thats the situation now but just that i am not raising my white flag.

talking to you, i can see how much you don't want it, more than what I expected. its like another reality check, but I refuse to sign in.

there are many fishes in the sea/ocean/world/universe. optimism. but what if i realized that the only fish, that i ever want, would be you? and that letting you go would be losing all i wanted and that other fishes would only be a substitute of who you are? (pity the other fish..)

=)
love cannot be forced out of nothing. nothing is what it is now. worse is that there is an additional 'layer/barrier' that i feel is being 'activated' to make things tougher.

sometimes, i do wonder what she said is true or not. that i might be wanting her for the sake of wanting her. that sure explains a lot. that sure makes me feel better.

i really. really. never believe in something so much.

i need a miracle.

u shd never asked why. but because we are humans, we eventually would.

why?

'Sweet misery you cause me, that's what you called me' - Michelle Branch's Sweet Misery

photo update (i left out pd T_T)

*brags* -- except the one with Nancy :P lol

looks may deceive, so can the title.

i enjoyed today, though i did nothing much.

a friend accompany me throughout the day (day as in afternoon- evening). played literati. fun. Ba, Ka, Tun, Pis, Fa. simple joys.

henglean commented that I am a pessimist trying to be an optimist. I look at things negatively but I try to find the positives from the negatives. Example, I screwed up at something, and apologize because I believe that apologizing can make things better.

I find the comment really interesting and sensible.

slept at Kammo's place the past two nights. going home later. have to go bank and tee tit first. no $$$, only 0.5$. laughs.


btw, nan's blog got a mini-drama going on. hope everything is going to be alright. true friends will always be friends right?

talked to kitmun today. can't wait to see her in person and cry! [either I miss her too much (v.unlikely) or cos' I can't tease her anymore].

What's Your Horoscope

June
Thinks far with vision. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Able to show character. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Brand conscious. Executive. Stubborn.

November
Has a lot of ideas. Difficult to fathom. Thinks forward. Unique and brilliant. Extraordinary ideas. Sharp thinking. Fine and strong clairvoyance. Can become good doctors. Dynamic in personality. Secretive. Inquisitive. Knows how to dig secrets. Always thinking. Less talkative but amiable. Brave and generous. Patient. Stubborn and hard-hearted. If there is a will, there is a way. Determined. Never give up. Hardly becomes angry unless provoked. Loves to be alone. Thinks differently from others. Sharp-minded. Motivates oneself. Does not appreciate praises. High-spirited. Well-built and tough. Deep love and emotions. Romantic. Uncertain in relationships. Homely. Hardworking. High abilities. Trustworthy. Honest and keeps secrets. Not able to control emotions. Unpredictable.

i want to but,..

i want to blog about PD, but dont want to do it w/o the pics

I worked for 4 days last week (Thursday was a public hol). I hate my work. I have to call companies and ask them to do survey and they won't get something in return. And sudahlah ppl wouldn't want to do an individual survey, where got people willing to sacrifice their working hours to do something for this.. (Therefore you have to convince their big boss the value of this survey and make him/her delegate it to their chuk chai(s)) lol.

I had an extraordinary journey yday. I went to Bangi. Now, I am not sure how true is this, but apprently its damn near to Nilai in Negeri Sembilan. Its basically the other end of Kajang. The cab charged me RM35 to go there. (I am going to be reimburse on this so its ok)

NEways, the person i met with, Mr Woo, he was nice enough and friendly enough to talk to me. Iwas on my own then w/o Han, so its weird but at the same time i was calm, no nervous feeling, though i know i should have questioned him more. Anyways, after the interview was over, i think we both chatted about another 15mins more on Malaysia, the current situation, politics etc... which is really nice. :)

After the interview, I had to go back to either KL or back home ma, prob is... WHERE TO GET A CAB... I see not even a single mode of public transportation around, no taxi. zero. no bus. not even those laoyah ones. nothing. But its okay. luckily han gave me the taxi cab number which i called. They say that i have to wait for 20minutes, which is fine by me... considering that it is far away from any nearby big cities.

anywho, the think is that i waited for more than twenty minutes but then the person still havent come mar, so i decided to be a pester and call up the company again. they put me on hold and later told me that the cab was around the corner.
awhile later, i saw this laoyah cab, not your std proton saga cab at the junction. w/o hesitation i know its him la. but just to be sure i go next to him and ask, I called you right? to One Utama? he nodd his head. i sat in the cab

not even 5mins later on the highway, i received a call frm a 019 number. this guy was saying that he is already at the place and cant find me. the guy on the phone is the ACTUAL taxi cab i called. so he was pissed and claims he is the victim (which is true) and i was pissed too at that idiot ahole taxi driver who conned me. anyway, i asked the 'victim' what can i do for him now that the damage has alrdy been done, he said, he wants some compensation.

finally, we decided to meet at UKM. that bitch ass wanted rm15 frm me.. i gave him 10, followed by rm1 (he claims toll is rm2... i was sitting next to him when he paid rm0.70... T_T ) dah lah already so much drama and i was meant to go to pavilion with cm to watch enchanted.. i waited at the guard house/nearby the masjid for the other cabby to come pick me. he called me moments later telling me that he is at the guard house near the MARKET... T_T i really wanna faint d... then i say lor.. not MARKET. MOSQUE MASJID... zzz and he keep yapping at me dunno why also.... neways, i let him talked to the security guard and that guy, gave him the same directions as I did, and he finally found me.. T_T

we had a good chat on the way back, but still.. he was trying to put the blame on me for taking the other cab... but seriously lor
1) where got so ngam when i was told the taxi is AROUND the corner , got another one and only taxi i saw since i reached that place come out of nowhere?!?
2) that idiot said yes..
3) i wasnt given any fucking codes la!!!!!
zzzz

went out with nancy and chingmay to yumcha at williams, then saw chew over there with his workmates... later king shung joined us. i think we spent about 2hrs over there. there was this point where cm and nan went to the washroom and i was left alone for 10+mins. twice the waiter came by wanting to clean the table (SO TEMPTING TO ACCEPT THAT.. then no need to pay.. lol)

damn jin lor, throughout the yumcha nancy keep cha me say i wont get a gf... T_T that i am not goodlooking etc... *sighhh WE LL SEE IF U LL GET ONE Ler *bluek*

now at kammo's house, been here since last night... nothing to do.. thats why i m blogging.

dunno wat to do tonight also.

wondering???

can ask rebecca out, can ask alicia, can ask cindy

can ask angela, can ask joanne... i think..
u must be wondering, all gurls one... well, i only got one group of guy friends ma... they are my std group... so everyday also will see them if they are around le. been spending time at hl's house lately.


'follow your heart, you will find a way, to the place where you longed to be'

time will tell.

time is time, what time is, what it will be, what it was, it is time
what happened happened, whats in the past you can't change
you cannot turn back time to mend the wrongs you made
you can't make time goes slower during those precious moments and grasp every second of it
nor can you make time goes faster to ease the pain
you cannot change time

time will heal the wound
question is how long is the time? an hour? a day? two? a month? six? a lifetime?
i don't know, but even it does heal, its different from what it used to be.
time,
when my heart breaks,
a piece of me died with it
and it will never be the same
people change with time
better or worse, i don't know
what will i become? i might be happy, but how sincere is it?
i don't really care,
i am heartbroken

time
i know that maybe all the while i m lying to myself.
to hope for something that you know is no longer there
time
i believe that time can bring my hope back
i m in my own world
when in suffering, people choose the road that leads to less pain
mine is self denial
to believe that what i think and hope is there
to see something that no one else could
and dream
it is always much easier that way than accepting the truth

time
i can smile, i can laugh, but inside i am slowly losing myself
maybe writing this made me feel better, but if it does its only momentarily
in the end the sorrows and sadness will overcome what's left of you in me

time
i am imagining things to make things easier for me
to grasp onto the very last hope that is slowly fading into dark
to hold on tightly to your hand that is slipping away
i choose not to let go, but i know i am lying to myself, my mind & heart

time
i can cry, i can beg, i can fall in love, i can touch, kiss and hug, i can jump around and laugh out loud, i can go wherever i want,
but what it is to me now,
is nothing but emptiness
i am hollow

time
maybe time will tell how much i really love(d) you
when i go on to my trips, when i fly away,
will i still think about you, dream about you, want you?
will i crave for your touch and feel the way i feel today that night?
time
no matter what, it doesn't make a difference
what if i still do, you don't
because how i still feel, i only make myself feel worse

time
i want to feel bright
the sunshine glaring on my days and make it as shiny as the stars
i want to feel happiness
like how we used to feel when we were little,
i want to cry
like i did when i lose someone meaningful
i want to dream
of you and me

which one is more difficult? convincing that I don't love you anymore or that I've already let you go.

*written on 17/12/06

everything you are and everything i'm not

i dont think my posts are dry, even though they are somewhat like that. i think i write better and a lil' more flowery than before... :P

i started work yday, didnt know that calling companies would be such a pain. really needs a lot of patience and perseverance to get through this job. i thought of quitting already.. lol, only cos i am afraid that i cannot help them as good as others. but hey, i ll look at it and say, i know i can do it.. just tryx3... the other trainee is rainee from help too. haven't met her b4 but she knows a someone who is my friend's friend...

bla

i talked to ja the other day, talked to hl yday, talked to huansin on sunday (same day as ja). mmm my sister said i never really opened up to her, thats true. but at the same time, i never really open myself to anyone... except my ex(s), i dont really share my stuff with the guys, girls at times maybe but that was during high sch.... not no longer ler. minli not here, hexiang not as close as before, jiayin i wud say is the closest, but still.. quite far apart lor. but i got yak at her lar lol... others.. hmm.. come and go kua. maybe when kitmun come back i ll kidnap her and torture her with my voice. lololo

i slept on the couch last night. i was tired. when hl was sending back i was already 3/4 asleep. too tired.

didnt really eat anything yday night other than a piece of Jen's brownies, bang chang kueh, crispy pancake and a piece of siu mai. wasnt like i was doing it on purpose. just takde selera untuk makan. (but i did eat some chips tis morning cos i was stressing on the calls -- so fixed back d)

koko krunch is made of mainly 1 - wheat... 2 - sugar. xxxx Ccw got it right..

later (not today, sometime) i will write out everything i have inside my phone and jst post it here. =) i only want to do it because i want to be more open, to everyone, not for anything else. :)

i like my nick

'eh eh, eh eh, eh eh, eh eh, eh eh eh........'

you can try guessing where its from :) hint. song.

might be going to singapore later tis weekend. i dont know. i want to, but not sure how to survive overthere.. lol we'll see.. hope everything turns out okay la

'i want to see a sign to tell me that i should believe'

pd and half-full

half-full or half empty? w/o hesitation i choose the first one. optimistic. its not that good afterall

just came back from pd, tmr starting work.

anna and joann's grad gift to me has yet to work in any of the comps i tried today. :(

talked about alot of things during pd trips. i teared at one point when i was telling honseng how i feel about them. quite emo

after that, i woke up and accepted that change is something people face. brace it

:)

face the change

broke, broken and half-full

dunno.

lost.

encounters with...

b f f

best friends forever - i learnt the meaning of this initial when i read the gossips etc abt some female celebs, most likely paris and nicole

the other time i rmb using the quote was when me kafaii ccw and another guy going to klang for bkt. i think other guy is daniel. we were making words from the plate alphabets and i saw BFFxxxx....

the guys laughed at me.


kit mun called me bff... i m not sure if thats a good thing...

lol

Drastic Fantastic

thats the title of the next album i am going to purchase. its from KT Tunstall. she rocks. I wanted to buy the cd yday, but I wasn't sure how good it is. I just checked wikipedia and apparently its well received, album filled with Bursting hits :)

I purchased Alicia Keys As I Am. I listened to it yday and today. No One is perfect. The first two songs too. Then there's I need you and a few others. Honestly, I never expect myself to buy any of her album. Its not that shes not great, in fact, shes wonderful! Piano playing, song writing, strong voice, Alicia is someone i would idolized. But, maybe its her music, RnB, which is not really my flavor. However, I read the paper a few days back and it was a review on this album. They said that it sounds different, after a long year for her. I dont know why I bought it, but I like it.

I am still waiting on my Taylor Swift, no sound/noise frm Kit Mun yet, last resort is talk to Big sis and ask her buy for me. hee. oH, i managed to convince Nancy to listen to her music. I listened to her yday , and I find it really impressive, her voice. :D Can't wait to get my hands on her album :D

Then, Lyd and Nancy and I went out yday to MV. We watched Rendition, a movie which to me is better than Blood Diamond. It shows to me that no matter how bad your govt is, other countries can be worse. I slept abt maybe 20mins during the movie, nt cos it was boring but i was tired :P

Nancy gave me this Shanghai letter knife if i m not wrong, and my S.H.E!! I cant wait to listne to it... will prolly bring to PD

Today, i watched I am Legend. I really dont know why ppl say its OK only. its really good. or least above average. 'zombies' + a Sign ending + something different than usual, its 7/10 movie to me.

i slept at ccw's house yday too. hehee.

i ll be starting work on monday, 9-5pm at kl sentral, what work? atm, its calling companies to sch interview with my boss. lol. rm400 a week if anyone asks. Nancy starting work on Monday to, too bad she is at uptown. :(

met up with Ching May today. She sometimes remind me of my 2nd sis, just because she is dark.. heee lol. its nice catching up, she's still mostly the same, nth much changed since i last talked to her in person. thats how i feel at least.

Ks' friend is one year older. i shouldnt blog about tis.

later i ll borrow kammo's car to drive home. tmr i ll drive it to PD. pray that i ll be safe and lucky and nothing bad will happen. i want a safe journey, accident free.


'I don't know how care about people, but that does not mean that I don't care about them'

realisation... and oh, 2008.

hey hey,

i think today is the day that i have most hours of sleep since i came back. i slept abt 2 hrs in the noon and prolly crashed yday night abt 3am and woke up in the morning ard 9ish. thats 8 hrs!!! lol

Happy 2008 to everyone who is reading this. have a great one, hope all of u have HIGHER resolutions (i find this really funny cos it ties with the graphic res. lol) and achieve them within the next coming 12months! :)

what are my resolutions? i dont think i have any, yet. maybe lose weight, but thats not new. lol

anyways, the new camera, my Sw, is working her way up. i tried the Shoot and Select func today and its really awesomee... and I can actualy alter the isos and etc, unlike wat the salesperson told me. xx

i read 1/2 of the manual, and i m still learning to play around with it. with the 2gb card, i can take about 1000+ pics, which is crazy!!! can't wait till one day i go crazy and just take everything from early morning till late night :D

i drove kammo's car the past few days, but i returned it yday. i dont really want to make myself feel accustomed to having a car, as i dont. i dont mind not having a car really. just that i have to trouble ppl fetching me back, and its not near also. seksyen 17 is really out of the way for EVERYONE. everyone. (unless nancy come to ou and then go back la :P) or we du ppl go to kl/mv and thne come back, that ll work too.

anyways, i ll be going for an interview tmr. i got referred to the job by jojo. i wud say its a telemarketing kinda thing, just that you call companies and get them to schedule an interview with the company that i might be working for. rm400 a week, thats really good.. compare to the VT's pay... lol.. (poor ian and joanne). hopefully all goes well, then at least i ll have something to keep myself busy with while waiting for other parts of my life to progress.

will be going out to curve later to see if i can buy the shirt that i really wanted but they dont have M size in ou. see how lor.

oh... i m a leech. i dont online at home. usually i on9 from my aunt's place. now i am hl's place.. hee.. parasite in disguise as this glass eyed boy with a white t shirt and jeans that are long that the end part got soaked into the puddle of rain water.

i watched Guess3 today. it was great. so ngam got S.h.E summo.. i think they are hosting it again. i feel a sense of comfort in the afternoon today, of being by myself. :)

everyone is moving on, i don't want to stay behind. i won't

so i'll sit up now and start walking.

:)

'Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end' - Semisonic's Closing time